Singles Rasslers:
These rasslers compete for the FPRL World Heavyweight Championship
SQUID-BO (Current FPRL Champion)
 "Well,
howdy there!" / "ROAWRRR!"
Squid-Bo is a man who has an actual squid for a head—an
entire squid with tentacles and everything. He's actually
a very friendly guy, but he plays a completely bestial, monsterous
rassler in the ring.
Career Highlights: FPRL Champion
Special Move: Ten Arms to Spin You With
Finishing Move: Squid Ink
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DIRTY HEEL
Dirty Heel is the main bad guy of the FPRL. He is an awful
person whose favorite passtimes are injuring orphans and humiliating
nuns. He takes great pleasure in causing great harm to other
rasslers, and tries his hardest to cheat as much as possible
in any match he is in. Dirty Heel also has an uncanny ability
to know about bad things that have happend in the past to
people in the audience.
Career Highlights: FPRL Champion
Special Move: Cheat
Finishing Move: The Dirty Bomb
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QUINN FLIMSY
 "Whatever you do to me, I will just bounce back."
This enigmatic badass learned at an early age that he was invincible whenever he let his body go limp. As a wrestler in his native Japan, Flimsy was prolific in the hard-nosed brutal style favored by his countrymen. But his true specialty - his ability to take any amount of punishment while flopping around the ring like a rag doll - was underavlued. Now in the FPRL, Flimsy's unorthodox style is right at home and there's no doubt that this seasoned verteran has his eyes on the FPRL championship.
Special Move: Spineless Submission
Finishing Move: Drinking Bird
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SOMBITCH
 "Uuuhh?"
The oldest active wrestler on the roster,
Sombitch has taken one too many shots to the head, and is
therefore a bit sketchy at times about who or where he is.
Career Highlights: FPRL Champion
Special Move: Crimson Mask
Finishing Move: Neck Grab Slam Ride Choke
Yard Inc.
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THE HIBERNATOR
 "I will mate and feed!"
A large hairy monster, the Hibernator sleeps for fifty years at a time and has lived for centuries. The last time he was awake, he became part of the freak show that would one day evolve into FPRL. Now the Hibernator stirs again, only the world is different and now he must not only wrestle, but learn about all that has changed since the fifties. Above all else, he must mate and feed.
Special Moves: Hairy Eyeball
Finishing Move: Sonic Roar
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BIG TALL
 "The bigger they are, the harder I'm tall."
The world's most modest giant, Big Tall is quick to reassure all that his impressive height of 7 foot eleven only makes him one of the tallest people on Earth.
Special Move: The Big Fall
Finishing Move: The Big Stomp
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WEIRD
 "That's
just... Weird..."
Weird is a man who may or may not have extradimensional
senses and abilites. It's either that or he is completely
insane. No one is sure why he became a professional wrestler,
and his explanation about the 17 squirrels that three years
from now will harbor a penguin in his sock drawer full of
precious soap doesn't help.
Career Highlights: Goo/Weird Champion
Special Move: The Weird Slap Shocker
Finishing Move: The Weirdmission
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AL SMILES
 "I
will put you in the <current name of finishing move>"
Al smiles is an unfortunate wrestler who
just can't seem to get popular with the fans. Management constantly
changes his gimmick in a desperate attempt to get him popular,
but he's such a dork himself that it doesn't really matter
what his gimmick is. He is sometimes known to go through three
or four gimmicks... all in the same night.
Career Highlights: Loser Champion
Special Move: Based on Current Gimmick
Finishing Move: Name changes based on Current
Gimmick, although the move itself is always the same.
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GAZELLE
Gazelle was created by the government’s Medusa Agency to be a perfect weapon. Mr. Money has bought her contract and now she wrestles in FPRL. This makes her very happy as, after countless dangerous missions, being in FPRL is kind of a fun walk in the park.
Trained as a sleeper agent, Gazelle doesn’t recall what word or sound triggers her into killer mode. She used to remember, but now nothing really rings a bell…
Special Move: Surgical Strike
Finishing Move: Target Lock
[Top]
HALORAN
 "I will complete wrestling sequence"
Haloran came out of nowhere and quickly made a name for himself in the FPRL tag team division. It wasn’t long before his dynamite, lightning-quick moves earned him a spot as a singles wrestler. While he is a little stiff and mechanical out of the ring, many have remarked that Haloran’s precision in the ring is almost inhuman. This guy is a real machine!
Special Moves: Chain Wrestle Subroutine
Finishing Move: Malfunction
[Top]
WHY NO
 "Am I going to lose this match? Why no!"
Nobody knows much about Why No. He shows up out of nowhere drunk as possible, makes a garbled speech with slurred words, and then proceeds to dominate in the ring using Al Smiles’ moves. Oddly enough, Al has never once been around when Why No shows up...
Special Moves: Bottle to the Head
Finishing Move: Al Smiles' Finishing Move
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EL MATADOR DE LOS SANTOS
 "Poetic. But no."
Mexican wrestling royalty, El Matador De Los Santos does not work for FPRL. In fact, he loathes FRPL and considers it to be the epitome of what he calls “inferior American style wrestling”. However, El Matador will wrestle wherever he is booked, so Mr. Money has started to book him in FPRL matches.
Career Highlights: 10 time Champion of the LLLWL (Legitimate Luche Libre Wrestling League)
Special Move: Manos Domine
Finishing Move: El Toro
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Loser Division:
These rasslers compete for the Loser Championship - whoever loses the match is victorious!
THE HUGGERNAUT (Current Loser Champion)
 "Somebody needs a hug!"
A former bit player on Silly Smiles Junction (Mr. Money's favorite show), the Huggernaut is concerned that everyone plays fair and follows proper etiquette and safety. He punishes bad behavior while setting a good example by losing gracefully in the Loser Division.
Special Moves: Cuddle Bug
Finishing Move: Hugger Nutter
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HE IS A MONSTER
 "..."
He is a Monster is an actual, real-life
monster. He isn't the brightest or most active of creatures,
needing a trainer or two constantly by his side. Even though
he can barely move, the other rasslers are under strict
orders to "sell" everything He is a Monster does
to them as if it is the most painful move imaginable.
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INCREDIBLE BASTARD
 "I
hate you all, because I am an Incredible Bastard"
Incredible Bastard would like to think that
he is a very aristocratic and hoity-toity fellow, but he is
severely emotionally crippled due to his nightmarish childhood
and the fact that he doesn't know who his father is and is
therefore literally a bastard.
Special Move: The Incredible Beat-Down
Finishing Move: The Family Jewels
[Top]
MARTYR
 "When you pin me, you won't be defeating a man - you'll be creating a martyr!"
An intense, dominating cultish abomination hell-bent on the undoing of civilization. He believes that by losing in the ring he will sacrifice himself for his cause and thus garner support and followers.
Special Move: Reightous Influence
Finishing Move: Lamb to the Slaughter
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Tag Teams:
WILDLIFE & WESTERNER: WW3 BOYZ
 Westerner
and Wildlife are packaged together simply
because both their names start with "W", continuing the trend started with the WW2 Boyz, Wushu & Wildlife (Wushu &
Wildlife: "WW." And there's "2"
of them. "WW2." Get it?).
Wildlife is supposedly an animal expert.
In reality, he is a moron who is deathly afraid of all the
animals in his arsenal.
Westerner is a level-headed cowboy who stops Wildlife from killing his animals, or vice versa.
Special Move (Westerner): Lasso Lariat Rope Trick Loop
Special Move (Wildlife): When Animals Attack
Finishing Move: The Wild Wild West
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ETHAN & TODD: THE BROTHERS
BOYZ
 "Shut
up!" "No, you shut up!"
A pair of actual brothers, they never grew
out of the stage of sibling development where they pick on
each other constantly. They often end up fighting each other
more than their opponents. The still live at home with their
mother (they have bunk beds).
Special Move (Ethan): Push oponnent into Todd
Special Move (Todd): Knock Ethan off of Ring
Finishing Move: Sissy-Slap-Fight Submission
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SWEET PEPITO
The enigmatic Sweet speaks
in a falsetto and has a uniquely light ring style.
Pepito seems to be some sort of happy creature in a skull mask who is controlled by Sweet's musical instruments.
Special Move (Sweet): Tickle
Special Move (Pepito): Whistlestop
Finishing Move: Comfortable Backrub
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THE FLYING FRENCHMEN
"Nous sommes les Français Fabuleux"
"We are the Flying Fremchmen!"
One of them speaks English, the other one speaks French, and the English speaker translates for the Frenchman.
Special Moves: Bastille, La Marseillaise
Finishing Move: Le Bip
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THE DOMINATOROES
 "Why are you getting up when we're just going to knock you back down?"
Having won every possible award in the competitive field of setting up and knocking down elaborate domino formations, Pip and Bones have moved onto the next logical arena for their talent: Wrestling. These smug cocky galmor boys are worshipped by their domino peers and perceive themselves as invaluable to the FPRL.
Special Move: Knockabout
Finishing Move: Thing Of Beauty
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I THINK PINK
"You Know What I Think? Pink!"
A completely normal woman and her annoying pseudo-beatnik brother who expounds the virtues of seeing the world in new, far-out ways.
Special Move: Trippety Do Dah
Finishing Move: Poetry SLAM
[Top]
WAY 2 B XTREME
 "No matter where we go it's to the extreme!"
Every one of their moves is an EXTREME move! Well, except for their wrestling moves, that is. Outside the ring they are friendly domestic types. Inside the ring: EXTREME!
Special Move: Standard Punch
Finishing Move: Small Package
[Top]
STAFF:
Mr. MONEY
 "Money,
money, money!"
Mr. Money, the president, CEO, and CFO of
MoneyCo Venture Capitalist Group, became the owner of the
FPRL when on a whim he enterd a contest to "Win a peice
of the FPRL." Since he was the only person who
entered, he won the ENTIRE company.
Mr. Money may not know that much about rasslin', but he sure
is enthusiastic about the product, and gets heavily
involved in all goings on. When his crazy sister married Mr. Network, Mr. Money was able to get his rassling show a deal to broadcast a live weekly show in prime time.
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MR. BUSINESS AND MRS. SUITSKIRT
 
These suits from the network try to insure that Mr. Money broadcasts a program that adheres to all guidelines and expectations from the FCC, Standards & Practices, the sponsors and from the network itself. They are constantly flustered by Mr. Money's wild ideas and often on the brink of quitting or being fired by their boss, Mr. Network.
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PLAY-BY-PLAY
Play-By-Play is one of the two commentators
of the FPRL. He calls the matches and tries to do a good job
with what he is given. He just wishes that he was announcing
a product of a higher quality, and often gets frustrated at
the incompetence surrounding him.
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COLOR
The "color" commentator, Color is a complete
moron who doesn't seem to actually know anything about professional
wrestling. He once drove purposefully off of a cliff with
three other wrestlers in the car with him. His favorite hobbies
include watching the movies Femalien
and Femalien 2,
making waffles, and talking incessantly about himself or his
hobbies at inappropriate times.
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GREG SCHILLER
Greg is the Ring Announcer who informs us
of who is currently making their way to the ring and any pertinent
information about the upcoming matches. His job is also to
tell the audience about any special deals happening in the
arena and what shows are upcoming. He often performs both
jobs simultaneously.
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THE PYRO TEAM
These guys set off the exciting pyrotechnic
display that opens every FPRL show. They're very into their
jobs, but also very into being as safe as possible, and keeping
the audience safe as well.
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Dr. HILLBILLY MD OF KICKING ASS
 This rassler kind of fell into the position of being the actual sports physician for the FPRL. What he lacks in medical knowledge he makes up for in rural superstition.
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THE EDITOR
The Editor is in charge of creating the entrance
videos and music for the FPRL Supterstars as they make their
ways to the ring. Sometimes his idea of what's appropriate
is very different from what most other people would think.
He is also very easliy influenced by some of the more mentally
unstable rasslers.
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