Posts from October 2014

Friday, 31 October 2014

New Article: Sew Ghostly with the Ocean Shores Pirate

Squishy scares!

Squishy scares!

Happy Halloween, everyone! I’m back today with another in my long series of Halloween crafts, and I’m joined by everyone’s favorite drawing of a pirate on a piece of plywood, the raging-drunk Ocean Shores Pirate!

Arr, thanks be to ye, mate, for havin’ me back in there here blog o’ yers.

No problem, OCP. Today we’re gonna be whipping up some ghosts.

Didn’ we do one o’ them ghostly crafts a few years back? Here, lemme dig through yer archives… yarr, there it be: Ghostly Crafts with the Ocean Shore Pirate! That were almost five year ago! Did ye think the booze saturatin’ my brain’d make me forget?

No, this is an entirely different craft project. I still hang up that paper ghost garland every year, though!

An’ every year I vomit into the most peculiar o’ places. Let’s be gettin’ on with it, eh?

This year I’m gonna show you how easy it is to make some adorable plush ghosts.

Can ye show ’em how to make a plush version of the ghost o’ me dignity? ‘Cause that be long gone.

Start with some soft white fabric. I have a bunch of white fleece lying around, so I’m going to use that. You could use felt if you want a less-stretchy version.

I… I can’t think o’ any puns that be about stretchiness an’ alcohol. Ye stumped me, ya bastard!

The first thing you should do is draw an outline of the ghost you want to make. Ghosts come in all shapes and sizes, from Pac-Man style scalloped-bottom ghosts to those with long, pointy, trails. They can have arms or not. You can make a bunch of these pretty quickly, so try a whole bunch of styles! Be sure to draw it about ¼″ to ½″ larger than you actually want (for seam allowances).

Draw a Gost!

Draw a Gost!

Arr… I got me a scalloped bottom from fallin’ off a pier into a bed o’ snappin’ scallops! The welts still ain’t gone!

Now make some sort of face for your ghost. You can cut out some eyes from a dark fabric and sew them on, you could use your sewing machine and some satin stitches to make a face out of thread, or you can even take a sharpie and draw on a face. Here I’ve cut two eyes out of some dark gray fleece and sewn them on with a straight stitch around the edges. Whatever you do, be sure to put the face on the opposite side of your drawn outline.

Spooky eyes.

Spooky eyes.

My face be drawn on me piece o’ plywood! Hey! Hey! Pay attention t’me!

Put your piece of fabric face-down on another piece of fabric so that the outline you drew is facing up. Then take it to your sewing machine (you can pin it or baste it if you want, but this isn’t an exact science, so if you don’t want to you don’t have to) and sew all the way around the perimiter, ¼″ to ½″ inside the outline. Leave about a 3″ gap somewhere so you can turn it rightside-out and stuff it.

Sew, sew, sew your ghost!

Sew, sew, sew your ghost!

I stuff me liver so full o’ booze that it be the size o’ the Wrigley Field in Chicago!

No it isn’t; I’d be able to see it coming out of your piece of plywood if that were the case.

I been meanin’ t’ask ye, matey: how can I be consumin’ so much hooch when I’m just a drawin’ on a piece o’ plywood anyway?

Magic.

That’s what I thought! Har-har!

Anyway, now cut out your ghost (through both layers of fabric) along the outline you drew.

This ghost is such a cut-up!

This ghost is such a cut-up!

Then turn it rightside-out.

This is why you need to mind the gap.

This is why you need to mind the gap.

There’s your face again!

It's mostly ghostly now!

It’s mostly ghostly now!

And here be my face!

Knock that off!

Ye can’t stop me! Here it be a dozen times!

Now stuff it with some stuffing! No need to overstuff it; it’s easier to finish it if it isn’t bulging with too much stuffing.

Stuff and nonsense!

This ghost is full of stuff and nonsense!

Now to seal up that opening. You can hand-stitch it closed if you want, or you can do what I’m doing here and tuck some of the fabric into the inside of the opening and top-stitch over it to seal it. Then just continue to top-stitch all the way around the ghost.

This top-stitching is the tops!

This top-stitching is the tops!

And while ye be at it, stitch up the hole in me side that got there ’cause I had to sell one o’ me internal organs in order to get more money to buy more hooch!

That’s it! You’re done!

Squishy scares!

Fantôme accompli!

Once you get the hang of this you can crank out bunch of ghosts in very little time. Give them away at your next Halloween party! They also make excellent cuddle buddies for wee ones:

Halloween Buddies!

Halloween Buddies!

Aye, or soak them in the finest rum and ring them out into the greedy, upturned mouths of yer party guests!

Or that. Well, thanks for another fun Halloween craft project, Ocean Shores Pirate.

And thank ye, Chris, fer pretendin’ not to notice that when I burp giant bubbles made o’ vomit & rum come out o’ me mouth and slowly float down to me crotch, where they burst with a fowl stench and a nethers-dampenin’ splash!

What do you think of this project, Ocean Shores Pirate?

Categories: Arts & Crafts, Featured Posts, Holiday.

Tuesday, 28 October 2014

The Holiday House: Halloween 2014

SPOOKTACULAR!

SPOOKTACULAR! This is a really big photo; click it to embiggen!

The Holiday House is all decked out for Halloween! Here are a couple of animated .GIFs of it for your enjoyment!

Spooky from across the street…
IMG_20141021_202754-MOTION

Spooky up close!
IMG_20141021_202920-MOTION

See you next holiday!

Categories: Holiday, Pictures.

Thursday, 23 October 2014

Eight More Days Till Halloween…

Categories: Holiday, Movies, Videos.

Wednesday, 22 October 2014

Tacoma City Ballet’s Haunted Theatre This Weekend!

The Haunted Theater. Sorry, TheatRE.

The Haunted Theater. Sorry, TheatRE.

This Friday evening we are dressing up and taking our wee one out for some culture; we’re going to Tacoma City Ballet‘s annual Halloween-themed event: “Haunted Theatre!”

I’ve never been, but apparently they dress their practice space up all spooky-like and have spooky dances and all sorts of Halloween awesomeness. It includes a “skeleton dance” choreographed by my pal Travis!

Skeletone Bone Dance

When it gets too hot to handle,
And you can’t eat ice cream cones,
It ain’t no sin
To jump out of your skin
And dance around in your bones!

Yes, the same Travis that choreographed this Julia Massey music video:

So it sounds like fun! You should join us!

Details:
Tacoma City Ballet Presents:
The Haunted Theatre: Backstage Tour & Eerie Dances (Tickets)
Friday, October 24th at 7 pm (we’re going to this one)
Saturday, October 25th at 3 pm
Saturday, October 25th at 5 pm
Sunday, October 26th at 1 pm
Sunday, October 26th at 3 pm
@ Tacoma City Ballet
508 6th Avenue, Tacoma, WA (map)
All-Ages $5 Cash/$6 Card

It also looks like there will be pumpkin butts!

Pumpkin Butts

There can be no ifs,
Ands, or buts.
All day long:
Pumpkin Butts!

Who WOULDN’T want to see that!?

Categories: Concerts/Shows, Holiday.

Tuesday, 21 October 2014

Fools Play Returns to Olympia THIS SATURDAY with Fools Play Trick or Treat!

We're back, baby! We're back, baby! Fools Play Trick or Treat in Olympia!

We’re back, baby!

THAT’S RIGHT! This Saturday, October 25th (the Saturday before Halloween), Fools Play Improv is returning to Downtown Olympia for a special show: Fools Play Trick or Treat! There’ll be costumes (including a costume contest for the audience with fabulous prizes), hilarious improvised sketch comedy scenes, and something I don’t want to ruin the surprise but it rhymes with “bandy.”

This is probably one of my all-time favorite Fools Play formats, so I’m pleased as punch that I get to be there and perform it for all y’all lovely people!

Not only is the audience encouraged to come in costume, but the Fools all costume it up as well. Here we are last year:

Foolish costumes.

Foolish costumes.

(That’s me on the far right as one of those Sesame Street “Yip-Yip” Aliens.)

This show is happening literally right around the corner from our last venue in Downtown Olympia, so there’s no excuse about not being able to find it. So I would love to see as many of my friends in the audience as possible!

Details:
Fools Play Improv Presents: Fools Play Trick or Treat!
Saturday, October 25th 8:00 PM
@ Husband and Wife Espresso
207 Washington St NE, Olympia, WA (map)
All-Ages, Only $5!

See yee theere!

Categories: Concerts/Shows, Fools Play, Holiday, Pictures.

Friday, 17 October 2014

New Music Video from Julia Massey & the Five Finger Discount: Paralleloplan(e)s!

paralleloplans

What does it take to be a ghost?

Hey, Julia Massey & the Five Finger Discount have a new album coming out next month: A.L.I.T.E.

If you just can’t wait that long (and let’s face it, who can?), you can hear one of the songs from that album RIGHT NOW by watching this new lyric video for the song Paralleloplan(e)s! Do you like puppets and roosters and masks? YOU KNOW YOU DO!

JM+FFD is having an album release party on Saturday, November 8th. You’d best believe I’ll have more info about that here on this here website here soon!

Categories: Music, Videos.

Wednesday, 8 October 2014

Music in Tacoma: The Jesus Rehab, Terrapin, TREVOR PEACH, & Back from Hiatus this Saturday at New Frontier!

It's a Tacomavaganza!

It’s a Tacomavaganza!

Last time a bunch of my favorite musicians performed in Tacoma, I just happened to be outta town. Well, not this weekend, baby! A bunch of great musical acts are gonna be in Tacoma this Saturday night, and I’m gonna be there! Yeah! Oh yeah!

  • The Jesus Rehab: 2-Person Seattle RAWK.
  • Terrapin: 1-person, loopy, spaced-out guitar goodtimes.
  • Back from Hiatus: I confess I’ve never heard of them, but I’ll listen to some of their stuff tonight.
  • TREVOR PEACH!!!!!!! The world’s best worst emo musician EVAR.

All of these musics happen at the lovely retro New Frontier Lounge down near the Tacoma Dome. Just a stone’s throw from my house (if you throw a stone, then drive for ten minutes).
New Frontier Lounge

As a two-for-one, here is Trevor Peach performing a Jesus Rehab song:

Details:
Back From Hiatus, The Jesus Rehab, Terrapin and Trevor Peach (Facebook Event)
Saturday, October 11th 8:00 PM
@ The New Frontier Lounge
301 E 25th St, Tacoma, Washington 98421 (map)
21+ / $5 cover

Trevor Peach gets Top Billing!

Let’s do this.

To me, my Tacomans. Let’s all go!

Categories: Concerts/Shows, Tacoma, Videos.